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Beingness and mind-consciousness through The Portal discussing COPING MECHANISMS


Susan Spies [14:00:39]
Beingness and Mind/Consciousness through The Portal tonight – discussing deep-seated self-programmed COPING MECHANISMS to look out for and also reflecting/introspecting on the inner-hell/demons that’s been opening up for each how you’re assisting/supporting yourself through them. See all tonight 21:05 SA (UTC+2)
Susan Spies [14:56:39]
*as a note here for the Mind/Beingness – to expand on MIND MAZES, how we deliberately create mazes in our minds, what they are exactly – to “lose ourselves” in our own problems for a lot longer and more extensively than is actually needed. So, we create our own problems to hide from parts of ourselves we fear to face. Goodness, we’re a complex species lol – or so we make ourselves beLIEve 😉
*在这里作为一个给心智/存有体的注释——去扩展到心智迷宫,我们如何故意创造迷宫在我们的心智里,它们确切是什么——去“使我们自己迷失”在我们自己的问题中更长的时间且更广泛 比起实际上所需的。因此,我们创造我们自己的问题以隐藏我们害怕去面对的我们自己的部分。天哪,我们是一个复杂的物种哈哈——或因此我们让自己相信(beLIEve,其中LIE:说谎)

Susan Spies [21:06:44]
Good evening all, the Mind and Beingness of all of existence here through the Portal – unpacking the COPING MECHANISMS we use/abuse to create MAZES in our own minds we LOSE ourselves within to in so doing, not face the darkness/hell/demons within us we “don’t like / want to see /admit exists within us”
Within this, we can say that we have GOOD INTENTIONS – we want to TRY and be better/best/more, but as they say “good intentions pave the road to hell”…which is where we’re at now, within ourselves and daily life on many different levels and dimensions within and without
So, who can share some COPING MECHANISMS you have identified within yourself / daily life towards your own mind, other people, things to do/get done you have become aware of or noticed?
因此,谁可以分享一些应对机制 你已经定义在你自己/日常生活里面朝向你自己的心智、其他人、你已经变得觉察到或注意到要做/需完成的事?
Or what comes up for you when you look at the word COPING MECHANISM?
或是 对你来说当你察看字词应对机制时什么出现了?

Daniel Malara [@dan2all] [21:10:55]
there’s always an excuse when I need one. Justifying distractions, instead of willfully staying focused

Susan Spies [21:11:26]
on a very deep beingness level, we have all an inherent tendency to, when something MOVES us – no matter how small or big and we cannot QUICKLY (McDonald’s style) identify the change/experience – we IGNORE it, move past it, brush it off/away as UNIMPORTANT and eventually, these changes surface as energy build ups into consciousness, which either manifests as mood-swings, personality changes, addictions, behavioural ticks and traits, habits that does not serve yourself, mind, body or others

Caroline [@lokbobpop] [21:11:35]
I lie down close my eyes and see myself walk in the room of infinite darkness and I imagine all the cells in my body I’m not dealing with break away and dissipate

Kim Amourette [21:11:40]
I’d say for me it’s judgments. Of reacting to problems I see in myself and others with judgment rather than understanding. Creating a maze of apparent well intendedness but I end up just lost and stuck, not ever really moving and changing our supporting change.

Carolyne Moigek [@CarolineMKS] [21:12:24]
I cope by watching stuff on my phone or simply play games on my phone at times esp.when feeling pressured
Another coping mechanism for me, biggest one is going silent quiet isolating mysrlf not wanting any disturbance from outside

Susan Spies [21:13:24]
Sunette’s sharing hers is pain and loss – hiding within and behind the loss and the pain of people and animals, failures of the past and circling within that; with identifying this – she’s now in the process of using this coping mechanism to empower herself through writings and vlogs, intrigued to see how this will come through in time to come: transforming pain, loss, sorrow and failure into strength, courage and healing
Sunette在分享她的是痛苦与失去——隐藏在里面并在人们与动物的痛苦与失去、过去的失败 的后面并绕圈在那之中;随着识别这些——现在她处于使用这个应对机制通过书写与视频博客来赋权她自己的过程中,好奇的看见在将来这些将如何过来通过:将痛苦、失去、悲伤和失败转化成力量、勇气和治疗

Ida Bra Ingadottir [21:14:48]
coping mechanism – for me what comes up is this point of existing within fear of survival and within that having to do everything you can to fit into that box. coping with the set rules, the programming, the matrix, the way you learnt to be/do. And this all in a sort of dead state, getting to the necessary points to ensure survival on different levels.. physical, cultural, family, success, relationships, image, whatever it is. Just doing what needs to be done to cope, keep up. Never really being at peace, here, living.. meeting self, others and the world in reality.
应对机制——对我来说,什么出现是这个存在于对生存的害怕/恐惧中的点,而在那之中必须尽你所能去做每件适应那个框架的事情。应对既定的规则、程式、母体、你学习是/成为/做的方法。而这一切处于一种停滞状态,到达必要的点以确保生存在不同的层面上…… 物质/身体、文化、家庭、成功、关系、形象,无论它是什么。只是做着什么需要被做以应对、保持。从未真正是/作为和平、在这里、活…… 遇见自己、他人和世界在现实中。

Rebecca Dalmas [@rebdalmas] [21:15:41]
I would say pain, but more as the word hurt . Inherent in this is blame – and I do notice it is easy to slip into dialogues of worry about what might happen based on the past – despite having walked through things and problem
Solved . Even though in this process this cycle appears to come up again.

Kim S [21:06:38]
I find there is a certain amount of comfort in pain, it’s like I know who I am in pain and there is a slight fear when all is stable to some degree – which what makes pain tempting
But at the same time I fight pain, keep all things breezy
Smile, make myself laugh and tell myself it’s nothing – underplay my emotions
Kim S [21:13:13]
I noticed how someone becomes withdrawn and moody/impatient with others when they are unhappy – and earlier today I could see how the ‘old’ me pre process would be this way
Like no one else understands my pain – and I would be moody with them
Exact point I am walking and writing about right now and what I am finding helpful is embracing all things I am grateful for
Kim S [21:15:57]
Humbled and grateful I am for life – and even with all its challenges it is shaping me as someone that can stand in the face of adversity and when I look at it in this way it becomes an adventure
Susan Spies [21:16:04]
Yes, KimS Kim – the energy of pain, loss, sorrow can become exceptionally addictive
是的,KimS Kim ——痛苦、失去、悲伤的能量可以变得特别上瘾
Kim S [21:16:35]
Takes great courage to walk out of it Sunette for sure !!
Sunette 需要很大的勇气走出来,确实!!
It’s so easy to sit in pain and wallow

Carolyne Moigek [@CarolineMKS] [21:16:05]
Silence and quiet meaning i go into shame because i feel i have failed. What follows is anger

Garbrielle Goodrow [21:16:28]
My coping mechanism one of them has been to get shelter in the comfort of my family/home/parents, like being a little kid again and having my parents protect me, tell me everything is going to be ok, and kind gain shelter behind the love my parents have shown me and also money

Tyler Skinner-Rosenberg [@tylerskinner] [21:17:01]
When something moves me to change, yes I brush it off / ignore it, using the justification that because it was something / someone(s) external, I can’t trust the CHANGE because I didn’t create it. This, even when I know it’s best for me.

Susan Spies [21:17:59]
almost to a point of adrenaline in a way – where you just drift away from yourself, the present and everything and everyone around you, go into an aloneness where you feel safe, secure, even though you’re lonely and afraid – here, it’s scary cause you make yourself believe no one will understand or know or GET you, so you then just stay there lol – or people make assumptions, which make it even worse…so eventually realised I gotta get into this PAIN I was so afraid of and never actually faced, because of the depth and extent of it, it’s scary
but I have begun and it’s not easy breaking through the fear of walking into and through this pain, sorrow and depth of loss – but taking my time and at the same time, laughing more I have found
the other day I was laughing, but like REALLY DEEPLY LAUGHING and I started crying, because I couldn’t remember when last I just genuinely laughed!!! I took some photos of myself cause I had to commemorate the moment!
Okay – will be sharing more of me in time to come, now back to the Mind/Beingness through the Portal –

Kim S [21:19:01]
I find I retrace my steps “what should I have done, why didn’t I do such and such” trying to make myself feel better
Self soothing in a way

Rebecca Dalmas [@rebdalmas] [21:20:17]
I am looking at the word playful – to step out is the seriousness of pain and hurt
And also pay more attention to my smile – the smile that lifts up my cheeks

Ida Bra Ingadottir [21:20:29]
Yes it is fascinating when you open up (the pain, sorrow, insights) and it opens up interactions with people.. you meet other where the both of you are at. Where it is like you come together in a point of recognition, release and strength.
是的这是奇妙的当你打开(痛苦、伤心、洞察)时,而它打开了与人们的互动…… 你遇见他人在那里你们两个都在。在那里这就像你们聚在一起在一个认可、释放和力量的点
… where you did not realize before what it would do to just open up.. where you start connecting with people who do understand.. or need understanding. while before both might have been isolated.. and now become stronger as two coming together in recognition, even if for a moment. The ripple can then have an effect in both lives to come
……在那里你之前没有领悟到去只是打开 它会做什么…… 在那里你开始与的确理解…… 或需要理解的人们连接。而在此之前双方可能已经分离开来……而现在当两者聚在一起在认可之中变得更强大,哪怕只是一会儿。然后涟漪可以有一个效应在两者未来的生活中

Andreas Wittmann [21:21:45]
Denial and suppression are coping mechansims for me – saying that i do not mind or that its not so important to me
the victim-character is a coping-mechanism, saying/pretending that i can not do anyhting about it and that everyone else is in some way responsible

Matti Freeman [@mattifreeman] [21:25:35]
“well fuck it, I’ll just decide that this is who I am, and I accept that this is how I am – then there’s no problem” = this can be really effective with getting to know the actual thing you want to change about yourself, embracing it, living it and not fighting it at all. Though there does come a time when it’s apparent that it really isn’t what’s best for self and I have to establish a change with myself, and it’s tempting to just use this attitude as a coping mechanism where I say ‘well I don’t see any immediate consequence, and I’m enjoying not having to think about changing’ —- but self honestly I see / know that what I’m doing is consequential in the long run
Susan Spies [21:26:34]
Interesting @mattifreeman Matti, well seen and shared
@mattifreeman Matti,很有趣,很好的看见与分享
Matti Freeman [@mattifreeman] [21:28:03]
it seems that a lot of the time judgment is used as motivation to change, but I think that’s because we fear who we might become / what we might do if we stop judging the thing and embrace it / become it fully
看起来很多时候评判被用作去改变的动力,但我认为这是因为我们害怕/恐惧如果我们停止评判事物并拥抱它/完全成为它 我们可能成为谁/我们可能做什么

Susan Spies [21:25:35]
Yes, and laughter is SUCH A SIMPLE action/expression – but got lost in such a state for a moment, for some time, I missed laughter – the simplicity of life

Susan Spies [21:28:23]
A SYMBOLISM that is coming up for us when it comes to COPING MECHANISMS which then transforms into MAZES we create in the mind by OVERCOMPLICATING a problem/issues – is seeing us as OLD VERSIONS of ourselves, all crooked and wrinkled, trying to walk with a cane
当提到应对机制对我们来说一个符号出现了,这个然后转变成迷宫 我们通过使一个问题/议题过分复杂化而创造在心智里——在将我们视为我们自己的旧版本,全都扭曲且皱巴巴的,试图拄着手杖走路

Susan Spies [21:28:26]
full on smile – eyes and all of me 🙂
Cane as SUPPORT – the story of CAIN and ABLE – I CAN/could do it, but I didn’t – instead of, I AM ABLE, RESPONSE-ABLE, ABLE TO RESPOND and so I DO IT, I MOVE, I ACT, I change
手杖作为支持——该隐与亚伯的故事——我可以/可能做这件事,但是我没有——而不是,我可以/能够(able:能,能够,可以。与ABLE:亚伯 为同一字词)、能够回应、能作出反应而因此我做它、我移动、我行动、我改变

Rebecca Dalmas [@rebdalmas] [21:29:10]
It appears that taking responsibility then triggers the fear of loss , as in a belief that what was walked through will not happen again . This must be because of the past . Have to become consistent within this . So perhaps a fear of consistency – like a fear of making money ?

Valentin Rozman [21:29:22]
I also need to learn to relax and laugh more and before that relese any negative association with the laughter since I experienced it in the past as a tool of some to get attention and manipulate others.

Susan Spies [21:32:12]
Alright, so – let’s do this: for Thursday evening 21:00 SA time, let’s meet with an example of an IDENTIFIED coping mechanism you noticed in a REAL TIME MOMENT and which TOOLS/SKILLS you applied to STOP COPING and start DEALING/DIRECT/CONFRONTING the problems within you burdening you within the mazes you created in the mind
好的,因此——让我们这样做:周四晚上21点南非时间,让我们来看一个识别你在一个实时片刻注意到的一个应对机制的例子, 以及哪一些工具/技能你应用于停止应对而且开始处理/指导/面对问题在你里面使你在你创造在心智里的迷宫中加负担的
I mean, you can RUN in the maze, but you cannot hide 😉
best to create your EXIT, stop running in circles and walk into life and living experience – which is scary, but also wondrous and filled with adventure
This is how us as the Mind/Beingness can support – lead you towards the EXIST from the internal MAZE and EXPOSE the coping mechanisms preventing you from your ABILITY to CHANGE MUCH FASTER than you give yourself credit for!
这就是我们作为心智/存有体可以如何支持——引导你从内在迷宫走向存在并曝露阻止你去改变 比你给予你自己信任要快得多的应对机制 的能力

Tyler Skinner-Rosenberg [@tylerskinner] [21:33:37]
Susan hard to do when you are in lockdown
Not necessarily @tylerskinner – can do it by taking up a challenge, like learning a new language, exploring new exercise routines, changing your dily routine, doing something OUT OF THE ORDINARY
@tylerskinner 不一定——可以通过拿起一个挑战来做它,就像学习一门新的语言,探索新的锻炼习惯,改变你的日常生活,做一些不平常的事情

Susan Spies [21:35:37]
remember, the MAZE and COPING MECHANISM can be doing the same schedule/things in the same way every day – monotony, predictability and in this keeping yourself, your mind state and self experience “set in stone” so to speak
Change something up, push yourself to do something different
For example, Sunette started waking up at 05:00 in the mornings, starting exploring different training sessions – this in turn inspired new ideas with projects she’s been wanting to set in motion and now actually are moving slowly but surely
So, SIMPLE things can have a MAJOR IMPACT if you even just look at how you lead your day and what you do and how
ADD in some new and different things and see what unfolds
Do also have a look at this aspect/dimension of your every day life
1. what can you CHANGE / do DIFFERENT / INTRODUCE in yourself/day
1. 你可以改变什么/做些不同的事情/介绍你自己/一天
Susan Spies [21:38:32]
2. an example of how you directed/dealt with an COPING MECHANISM you noticed/realised you accessed
2. 一个你如何指导/处理一个你注意/领悟到你所接取的应对机制的例子

Susan Spies [21:38:41]
and we reconvene Thursday evening same place and time
Sound good?
Thank you all for being here, Sunette also excited to join in and share her 2 points and findings on Thursday
Thanks to all for being here, making this chat happen, sharing and participating – genuinely grateful
Bye for now!
Take care and speak Thursday